Monday, March 13, 2006

Feeling Hot, Hot, Hot

When I was a kid, my mother would always cut the feet off of my feetsy pajamas. After repeated trips to her bedside in the middle of the night, crying in fright from heat induced nightmares, I was not allowed to have my little piggies covered while I slept.

As an adult, my pajamas no longer come with the unisock effect, but I must still be careful of overheating. So when the temperature changes drastically, say oh I don't know twenty degrees like it did this weekend, I should not have two blankets and a flannel sheet covering my body. Because waking up violently at two-thirty in the morning when a giant white frog just devoured a giant lizard, and is then going for your hand as his next meal, is not fun. The jumping while still sleeping is not fun. The screaming when your fiance tries to comfort you is not fun. Nor is it fun, two hours later after you have removed one of your blankets, to find out that a knife wielding psychopath is slaughtering your neighbors and has left two dead bodies lying on the bed next to you. That is not fun. The not being able to fall back asleep for over an hour because you are afraid that the knife wielding psychopath is actually in your apartment is still not fun.

Not being hot is fun. A full nights sleep is fun. Opening the window to let in cool air is fun, until you think about the knife wielding psychopath and close it. He will never be fun.

I wish this one could have been as easy as having my Mom remove the little metal scissors from her wooden nightstand and snip off part of my clothing, leaving me looking like a disheveled Peter Pan. But at least I was a Peter Pan that could sleep.

6 comments:

she's so blase said...

Wow - giant, white frogs, psychopaths and dead bodies. Those are some pretty heavy dreams. Are sure that was aspirin you took before bedtime?? But all that aside - as one of your loyal readers from the New England area I just want to clarify - are you complaining about the temperature being 20 degrees warmer???

allison said...

One word...

...AMBIEN.

That is all.

number4of5 said...

SSb, I am not complaining about the weather being warmer, just caught of guard when it reached the 80's here on Monday. Hell, now I am complaining, March is way to early for it to be that hot. Although I do think it is my birthright, as a New Englander, to complain about the weather whenever I feel like it.

Allison, funny you should mention that. After one of my sisters read this she asked me if I used to take the medicine for my nightmares. Apparently my Mom was giving her drugs to deal with it, and I just got the scissors. I am not sure if I should be happy about that or upset.

numero uno said...

To clarify......I did get the medicine...but I too lost the feet on my PJ's...and usually had to stand in the bathroom with my hands in cold water til I woke up/stopped screaming.

Saw a report on the news this AM about Ambien...and how people have been "sleep walking", "sleep eating" and "sleep dialing" while taking Ambien....not sure how that will make things better.......

Numbah 2 said...

Wait until you are pregnant. Add that to the changing temperature outside and you will have a really fun night.

I keep referring to my "War" dream when I talk to NTS about the comforter (which I refuse to have come near me at this point.) Oh yes, in my "War" dream we were at war (much like we are now) but we were being attacked. We were fully under seize and I had my new baby to protect and we were running from house to house to try to get to saftey. That was fun. I woke up and boy was I hot. Very hot.

And then this weekend, despite my attempt to keep the comforter off of me, it seemed to find its way on to my lower legs. As a result, I had a dream that I was representing some family member at a real estate closing and my whole family was there.

Well, the other attorney didn't like the issues that I was bringing up (they thought I was being a little difficult, but I was just looking out for my family!). The weird thing was that the closing was in this old house in the middle of nowhere.

So the other attorney asked me to come with him into the other room for a moment. He started leading me down this hallway that was a series of doors about 10 feet apart. At the third door, I made a remark that this hallway reminded me of a dream I had the night before (yes, its true, I was referring to fake dreams within my dream). And I told the guy that in my dream the night before, behind the last door Hannibal Lecter was sitting there waiting for me. And then we opened the third door and the fourth door was EXACTLY like the door that I had opened in the fake dream which had Hannibal Lecter behind it!!! So I started screaming for help - and you may be happy to know that I was screaming out your name for you to come help me! I was just screaming and screaming your name and then I woke up. And I was hot. And the comforter was on my legs.

The comforter has officially been banned from my side of the bed.

number4of5 said...

Holy shit, what is wrong with us. I don't think the boys get nightmares, WTF?

#1- That cold water trick sounds like torture, I am glad M&D never tried that on me. Do your girls get nightmares? That is one thing I hope I never pass on.

#2- This is by far the funniest commment ever left on my blog. I don't even know what to say exccept that you have given me reason number 472 for why I am so scared to be pregnant. It is bad enough trying to survive my own dreams, never mind protecting a baby in the process. Hannibal Lecter also haunts my dreams on a reoccuring basis, but yet I watch Silence of the Lambs every time it comes on. Smart. I wish we could join our dreams together so that we could help each other out. Like, in my dream I will hear you screaming for me in your dream and I will ignore the knife wielding psycho and come running for you. Kristin could help us, but I think she will be too busy soaking her hands in cold water.

The comforter needs to be burned.