Friday, October 03, 2008

Trente-deux


Turning 32 means that I am now the same age that both of my sisters were when they had their first child. Since that isn't on my agenda for the coming year, I have been trying to shake the feeling that I am falling behind. It is a strange thing being a younger sibling and having these artificial benchmarks of when certain life events should be happening. You would think that this would have disappeared after taking seven years to finish college, but it hasn't.

Then, last night while taking this family photo, I realized that I am not actually falling behind. Since Jack is now a member of our family, that makes me his Mom. And since that happened when I was 31, I am actually ahead of the game. There may not be diapers to change, there is still plenty of poop to clean up. And a lot more fur.

It has been hard to think about celebrating my birthday without Derek. But the day is here, and he isn't, and life goes on, right? But I miss him. Last year he and I got into a fight about my birthday, because he wanted to have a party, and I didn't. What a stupid thing to fight about, huh? If he were alive I would probably still be bickering with him about something as equally ridiculous. Meh.

I want to finish this on a happier note, so here is another one of my little guy. We weren't actually touching, which is what makes this photo so much better.


And one more of the my other guy.

3 comments:

Numero Uno said...

Happy Birfday to you! Hope you have a great day.....BTW if you are going to come up with these crazy deadlines for yourself you should make she you apply the right timeframes - I was 33 when Cate was born.... you have another year!!!!

carolyn said...

happy birthday, kid. ah, 32... i can't even remember it!!

Numbah 2 said...

And I was 34 when my first little one came along - you need to check your math and stop putting pressure on yourself!! :)